Comments on: a walk in the park… http://paxye.com/blog/a-walk-in-the-park/ My journey through motherhood being a black sheep in the parenting world... Sat, 22 Nov 2008 06:46:54 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.3 By: paxye http://paxye.com/blog/a-walk-in-the-park/#comment-376 paxye Tue, 02 May 2006 13:17:02 +0000 http://paxye.com/blog/?p=248#comment-376 laimsmom: I need to find the stats but I remember seeing/hearing that there are less crimes now then 20 years ago... However, the news has more coverage and use fear so much more... I do remember that Micheal Moore talks about this in Bowling for Columbine also... msaraan: I would have been taken by surprise and probably appalled at that situation also, it is a response that is part of ou culture. I remember seeing something simular in Montreal a few years back in a very busy multi-cultural neighborhood (with a high crime rate)... Often I see that women that come from elsewhere where kids are expected and taught to be resposible very young (a la Continuum Concept) that their values stay with them and the children even at 4 are so much more resposible then some of our societies children at 10... laimsmom: I need to find the stats but I remember seeing/hearing that there are less crimes now then 20 years ago… However, the news has more coverage and use fear so much more…
I do remember that Micheal Moore talks about this in Bowling for Columbine also…

msaraan: I would have been taken by surprise and probably appalled at that situation also, it is a response that is part of ou culture.
I remember seeing something simular in Montreal a few years back in a very busy multi-cultural neighborhood (with a high crime rate)…
Often I see that women that come from elsewhere where kids are expected and taught to be resposible very young (a la Continuum Concept) that their values stay with them and the children even at 4 are so much more resposible then some of our societies children at 10…

]]> By: liamsmom http://paxye.com/blog/a-walk-in-the-park/#comment-375 liamsmom Tue, 02 May 2006 04:39:53 +0000 http://paxye.com/blog/?p=248#comment-375 What I find bizarre is how our streets are desolate during the day. Sure some of the parents are afraid to let them play outside alone but I think ALOT if them are spending way too much time inside playing video games. All us neighborhood kids used to be outside til 8pm playing baseball. I miss not seeing that. Anyway Paxye I understand your not wanting to let fear dictate how your kids play but I do myself think it isn't as safe as a generation or two ago. (Or maybe same number of perverts but they are more brazen these days??) Dunno. I will teach DS everything I can about avoiding dangerous situations but that will not stop a van from pulling up alongside him and snatching him. What I find bizarre is how our streets are desolate during the day. Sure some of the parents are afraid to let them play outside alone but I think ALOT if them are spending way too much time inside playing video games. All us neighborhood kids used to be outside til 8pm playing baseball. I miss not seeing that.

Anyway Paxye I understand your not wanting to let fear dictate how your kids play but I do myself think it isn’t as safe as a generation or two ago. (Or maybe same number of perverts but they are more brazen these days??) Dunno. I will teach DS everything I can about avoiding dangerous situations but that will not stop a van from pulling up alongside him and snatching him.

]]> By: msaraann http://paxye.com/blog/a-walk-in-the-park/#comment-374 msaraann Tue, 02 May 2006 01:42:25 +0000 http://paxye.com/blog/?p=248#comment-374 I also remember it being the norm for kids of all ages to wander around without adult supervision when I was growing up. Maia actually has begun to ask to go to the playground by herself, or with her sister, but for me to stay home. I know that she would conduct herself responsibly as I did at her age, but I'm too afraid to send her out on her own. I have begun to let her go ahead of me to the playground, and to wander a bit further within my sight. I once encountered at a park a four-yr-old girl in charge of her pre-walking baby brother. She said her parents were home taking a nap. I was appalled, but she was taking fine care of herself and "her baby" as she called him. I also remember it being the norm for kids of all ages to wander around without adult supervision when I was growing up. Maia actually has begun to ask to go to the playground by herself, or with her sister, but for me to stay home. I know that she would conduct herself responsibly as I did at her age, but I’m too afraid to send her out on her own. I have begun to let her go ahead of me to the playground, and to wander a bit further within my sight.

I once encountered at a park a four-yr-old girl in charge of her pre-walking baby brother. She said her parents were home taking a nap. I was appalled, but she was taking fine care of herself and “her baby” as she called him.

]]> By: paxye http://paxye.com/blog/a-walk-in-the-park/#comment-373 paxye Sun, 30 Apr 2006 21:10:11 +0000 http://paxye.com/blog/?p=248#comment-373 I agree with you, I am the kind of mom that will probably go with the boys to the park. However, I know that one day they will want to go alone (or together hopefully) and I will have to trust them... We live in a small rural city in a very family friendly neighborhood... the park is about two blocks away from us... Of course the time that I have this trust will probably come sooner then if I still lived in Montreal, but when I really think about it the dangers may be the same... I have less fear here however... I agree with you, I am the kind of mom that will probably go with the boys to the park. However, I know that one day they will want to go alone (or together hopefully) and I will have to trust them…
We live in a small rural city in a very family friendly neighborhood… the park is about two blocks away from us…
Of course the time that I have this trust will probably come sooner then if I still lived in Montreal, but when I really think about it the dangers may be the same… I have less fear here however…

]]> By: mouthy_mom http://paxye.com/blog/a-walk-in-the-park/#comment-372 mouthy_mom Sun, 30 Apr 2006 16:56:23 +0000 http://paxye.com/blog/?p=248#comment-372 Like you, I want my kids to grow up free to explore -- but I'm also scared. You're right, there were probably just as many perverts when I was growing up; we just hear so much more about crimes against children now. I totally trust my six-year-old to stay within her boundaries, but I worry that a lone child might attract the attention of someone evil. We live in the inner city, which is probably really as safe as the suburbs -- but we're pretty sure there's drug dealing going on quite near our house. Also prostitution. Addicts can make alot of money selling kids for sex and pornography. I'm still not willing to resort to TV and video games. My solution is to be outdoors with her, but back off and let her climb trees, dig in the dirt, and make new friends. Whereas our moms could shoo us out the door and catch up on housework, I often let the house go. What little housework I do, she often helps me with. I think each mother needs to do what feels right to her. For me to criticize another mom for letting her seven-year-old go to the park alone, is just as bad as her calling me a "smother-mother." Like you, I want my kids to grow up free to explore — but I’m also scared. You’re right, there were probably just as many perverts when I was growing up; we just hear so much more about crimes against children now. I totally trust my six-year-old to stay within her boundaries, but I worry that a lone child might attract the attention of someone evil. We live in the inner city, which is probably really as safe as the suburbs — but we’re pretty sure there’s drug dealing going on quite near our house. Also prostitution. Addicts can make alot of money selling kids for sex and pornography.

I’m still not willing to resort to TV and video games. My solution is to be outdoors with her, but back off and let her climb trees, dig in the dirt, and make new friends. Whereas our moms could shoo us out the door and catch up on housework, I often let the house go. What little housework I do, she often helps me with.

I think each mother needs to do what feels right to her. For me to criticize another mom for letting her seven-year-old go to the park alone, is just as bad as her calling me a
“smother-mother.”

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